The Cure (?) for Loneliness

For years mental health professionals taught people that they could be psychologically healthy without social support, that “unless you love yourself, no one else will love you.” The truth is, you cannot love yourself unless you have been loved and are loved. The capacity to love cannot be built in isolation. —Bruce D. Perry, M.D., Ph.D. — “The Boy Who Was Raised As A Dog”

I remember one time during English class my teacher asked: how do you cure loneliness? What can you do to not feel lonely? To my dismay, it remained vaguely unanswered.

Loneliness is quite a dangerous thing. I feel like when one is left to his/her own thoughts too often, without anyone to turn to or anyone to provide an extra ear or shadow of comfort, it can really have an effect on one’s mind. You think too much. Your thoughts go from one thing to another. You end up having a constant battle in your mind and you wish that you can just talk to someone without having them completely blow you off. Just someone who would listen.

The problem is, not many people listen nowadays. I don’t know how many times I’ve vented to someone and have them end up ignoring me completely while they start telling me about their problems. I’d taken the risk of telling you something so, so personal about me, just to have you fail to listen. How amazing is that? Sarcasm intended.

So what is the cure for loneliness? I used to think that loneliness could be solved with just a simple movie or a trip to the mall. But you see, my favorite romcoms and chick flicks can only do so much. What do you do when the movie ends? Watch another one? And the mall. Damn. You can still feel so lonely even in a sea of people.

If you know a cure, or at least some type of antidote, please let me know via comment. I would love to hear it.

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